Me: Can I go to the bathroom?
Teacher: What for?
Me: TO OPEN THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS What do you fucking think for.
I hate it when my mom thinks that whatever i do is...
totally-relatable: And I’m Like.
Teacher: C'mon guys! You did this in 3rd grade!
Student: I don't even remember what I had for dinner last night you fucking whore
Husband, say your name